Top Ten Things You Don't Want To Hear At The Beach
10. "You're going to have to put on a top — oh, sorry, sir"
9. "Forget about sharks, I thought I saw a tomato in the water"
8. "Due to the mortgage crisis, we're foreclosing your sand castle"
7. "We're out of mayo; use the Coppertone"
6. "Wow, that lifeguard can really put away the gin"
5. "The water? It's about 11 miles that way"
4. "I know you're not drowning, but would you like mouth-to-mouth anyway?"
3. "Giant squid! Run for your lives!"
2. "Are you here for the Al Qaeda summer picnic?"
1. "Now where did I bury Grandpa?"
