It’s Belgian Independence Day. They’ve given the world so much . . . the Belgian waffle . . . but it’s great.
Belgium is a nice place, though. It’s the place people go to when they’re on their way to another place, a place they’re going to spend more time at. It’s kind of the Jennifer Aniston of countries.
Belgium is the Mexico of the Netherlands.
In parts of Belgium they still speak Flemish. It’s a language based entirely on flem.
A child of one can be taught not to do certain things such as touch a hot stove, turn on the gas, pull lamps off their tables by their cords, or wake mommy before noon.
- Joan Rivers
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright
“Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.” - George Carlin
"Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?" - Anon