Gluten-Free is Code?

So gluten-free is code for tastes horrible? - Jim Gaffigan

A New York Halloween.......

Here in New York City, Halloween a little bit different. You get that knock at the door, you open it up, and there are four guys with masks. - David Letterman

Monopoly!

Breaking: The newest version of the game "Monopoly" will come with a government bail-out option. - The Fake CNN News on Twitter

Rich People More Depressed.......

Health: Rich people have higher depression rates than poor people. Mainly because poor people can't afford to be diagnosed with depression - The Fake CNN News on Twitter

Anita Renfroe - You Raise Me Up!

Another great parody by Anita Renfroe called "You Raise Me Up" - A tribute to Underwire:

Rita Rudner on Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan late for her job at the morgue. Dead people furious. - Rita Rudner

Craig Ferguson Funnies

It was on this day in 1867 that the United States bought Alaska from the Russians. And about six months from now, we’ll probably be selling it to China. 

Las Vegas is a weird place for politics. Why would something known for sleazebags, prostitutes, and gambling want to be associated with Las Vegas?

One town in Alaska is called Deadhorse. Another one is called — and I'm not making this up — Manley hot springs. Which is also the name of a club here in West Hollywood.

If Only.......

If only opening a Vitamin Water could be classified as working out. - Jim Gaffigan

Lampanelli Slams Demi-Ashton!!

Moving truck allegedly seen outside Demi & Ashton’s house. Comes a time when every young man needs to move out of his mother’s house! - Lisa Lampanelli

We Have No Idea

Let's all stop speculating about Ashton and Demi. We have no idea what those two are going through...aside from puberty and menopause. - Joan Rivers

Nissan is Developing a Car That Can.....

Nissan is developing a car that can read the driver’s mind. The 1ST thought it usually picks up is “I wish I could have afforded that BMW.” - The Fake CNN on Twitter

The Truth

I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender. - Rodney Dangerfield